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Rethinking Infidelitycomes near the beginning. More women than ever chext cheating Singles Springfield Illinois net, she tells us, or are willing to admit that they are cheating — and while Perel spends much of her book examining the psychological meaning, motivation, and impact of these affairs, she offers little insight into the significance of the rise itself.

So what exactly is happening inside marriages to shift the numbers?

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What has changed about monogamy or family life in the past 27 years to account for the closing gap? And why have so many women begun to feel entitled to the kind of behavior long accepted albeit disapprovingly as a male prerogative?

These questions first occurred to me a few years ago when I cheaf to wonder how many of my friends were actually faithful to their husbands. From a distance, they seemed happy enough, or at least content. Like me, they were doing the family thing.

They had cute kids, mortgages, busy social lives, matching sets of dishes. On the surface, their husbands were reasonable, the marriages modern and equitable.

What surprised me most about these conversations was not that my friends were cheating, but that many of them were so nonchalant in the way they described their extramarital adventures. There was deception but little secrecy or shame.

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Often, they loved their husbands, but felt in some fundamental way that their needs sexual, emotional, psychological were not being met inside the marriage. Some even wondered if their husbands knew about their infidelity, choosing to look away.

Women who want to cheat Statesville mt were also unwilling to bear the stigma of a publicly open marriage or to go through the effort of negotiating such a complex arrangement. These women were turning to infidelity not as a way to explode a marriage, but as a way to stay in it. Whereas conventional narratives of female infidelity so often posit the unfaithful woman as a passive party, the Jefferson OR sex dating I talked to seemed in control of their own transgressions.

There seemed to be something new about this approach. To do so, she interviews 40 women who sought or participated in extramarital relationships through the Ashley Madison dating site.

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Surely, one might think, a woman who would do such a thing must be acting out of a desire to escape a miserable marriage. Many of the women Walker interviewed were in marriages that were functional.

Like the women I knew who cheated, many of the interviewees said they liked their husbands well enough. They had property together. They had friendships together.

They had children that they were working together to raise. But at the same time, Edmond adult fun found married life incredibly dull and constraining and resented the fact that as women, they felt they consistently did a disproportionate amount of the invisible labor that went into maintaining their lifestyle. Eho of the friends I spoke to expressed similar feelings.

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My mom got this phrase from her therapist: I think women do that a lot. They hang on in ways that are often invisible. A lot of women have tried to address these problems and have faced a lot of stubbornness from sho.

chheat So maybe now what women are deciding is that infidelity is a third way. Juneau sex service now tell women that they can have it all, that they can work and have a family and deserve to be sexually satisfied. I tested this idea out on a few of the friends who had confided in me about their affairs, and most of them agreed.

Twenty or thirty years ago they might have opted for divorce, because surely there was another man out there who could do better in this role, who could satisfy them completely. But a lot Statedville these women are children of divorce. They lived through the difficulties divorce can create.

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That was our Christmas. Why did these people marry in the first place? I confided in a friend once that, after 15 years Womfn marriage, the institution and the relationship itself continued to mystify me.

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It promised to expand my circle of family and improve my credit score, to tether me to something wholesome and give my life meaning. Could any single relationship not fall short of such expectations?

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Sometimes I wonder if when the kids leave I should either a have a passionate affair or b find another husband. I may do neither, but it seems like a is more likely than b.

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Why So Many Women Cheat on Their Husbands

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